Monday, March 30, 2009

Aw, shucks!

Just as I was in the middle of writing about my precious venue, my mother calls and delivers bad news. We've been pushed out by people with "big money".

I'm sad.

That is all.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Found something for him to do

My guy has had only one task to do when it comes to this wedding: Sit there and look pretty, and agree with me when I ask for an opinion. I guess that's two things. The reason I took this approach is because he is genuinely not interested in any of this planning stuff. If it were up to him we would invite our parents to a courthouse and get it over with, or even better: fast forward to the wedding night. He almost ran off and got married to himself when he found out how much he would save on car insurance if he was married. I have kept my asking him for opinions at a minimum just because I get so frustrated with his lack of crazy-vision and inability to coordinate. However, I found something for him to do and am just so crazy about it.

He is very good at making things for me and this would be right up his alley. I found this on and instantly thought it was the greatest idea ever. The woman who did this included her invitation, scrap from her dress, pins from her bouqet, and a brooch that I beliieve was her grandmothers. I don't know where she got the 2006 sign but I like it.

I started to think of all the places I could put it and how perfect it was because it sums up the entire day in 2 shadow boxes, and since my current invitation plan is to screen print handkerchiefs it just added to my desire for him to make it. It is now on his to-do list and lucky for him, he has more than a year to git-er-done.

Now I only wish I wasn't such a minimalist. I have 9 months to change that- maybe a visit to J.Crew will spark it all.

What are you doing to preserve your wedding day?

Boudoir Inspiration

A little boudoir inspiration for your day. The beautiful and uber talented Emmy Rossum in the newest issue of Details magazine.

What inspires your boudoir photography?

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I'm back and ready to attack!

Well I am back, but not so ready to attack. My semester is coming to a close and it seems like everything is slowly starting to funnel into a big mess-final trial, preparing witnesses, 40 page papers with interviews to still conduct, volunteer committments, finals (AAAH!) so for the next 3-4 weeks I will post when I can but I am so excited to share all my ideas with you, and within the next month we will be sending out our save the dates so I can't wait to share that with you as well.

I found my venue also, but I'm a bad blogger and didn't get any pictures mainly because someone else was using it at the time and I didn't want to seem rude. More about the venue later.

Until next time kiddies!

Monday, March 16, 2009


The MR: We never decided on anything

Me: Yes, we did. We totally had that conversation

The MR: Yes, we had the conversation but nothing was decided.

Me: It so was! I even put it on my blog

The MR: Putting something on your blog does not make it true.

You make me feel like I am whole again

Since I just finished telling you all about Omaha, it only makes sense that todays song of the week would be by a Omaha band- 311. I love this song and have had more than 1 man sing it to me on occasion- Sorry Mr. Here you go, Love song by 311.

*If you love the original version by The Cure then the title of my post links to it.

Getting to Know You Honeymoon, Part 2

We decided on a getting to know you honeymoon! We will show each other our respective hometowns and what parts are important to us. I love this idea and so does the Mr. What better way to get to know each other than understand their past?

We have been together for 5 years and although we have heard all about our hometowns from each other, neither one of us has actually been to each others hometowns. I'm from Omaha and he is from a small town in New Jersey. We decided that I would take him to all my favorite places in Omaha and he could take me to his in Jersey, then we would swing by New York since I've never been and maybe, just maybe, take a train to Philly since I have always wanted to go. I am more excited about this trip than my wedding. I want to show him everything I love about Omaha, like the Henry Doorly Zoo!

I know the Mr. would love the aquarium because he is a fish lover, and as a kid, the jungle/ rain forest was always my favorite part.

Because we no longer own any winter clothes, not even a glove, we decided the best time to go would be in late July- early August after I take the bar exa which makes it the perfect time to go see a College World Series game or two- something I used to do every summer as a young'in.

And after the game we can have races down the slides.

We will then go swing over to the Old Market and eat outside, listen to the music, and browse around the cute shops- the bookstores of which are my favorite.

We have to eat while we are there so I plan taking him to my favorite of all favorite resturants ever- places of which I wish I could find anywhere else:
Joe Tess- best catfish ever- I dare you to find some place better.
King Fongs- best chinese food ever. EVER!
Sakura Bana (formerly Sushi Ichiban)- best sushi EVER EVER EVER! MMM...I have a sudden craving for a sasadango.
Ted & Wallys- classic Ice cream in huge waffle cones
Skeets BBQ- best barbeque sauce EVER! I want the recipe! Dangerous neighborhood so if you visit, you may want to skip it.
Little King- best sub shop EVER! This was my packed lunch on field trips.
Runza- fast food but a staple you can't leave Omaha without getting.
Lots of EVER's huh? That's because I mean it.

After eating Omaha out of house and home we can go relax with a boat ride at the Fountain.

And, I'm giving away a piece of my anonymity here, but we must swing by the Joslyn Art Museum or Joslyn Castle.

I was named after the Joslyn Art Museum because my parents had their first date there so even if the Mr. will hate it, he has to go to "my" museum with me. And even better if it's during Jazz on the Green- we can sit back, relax, and listen to some great music.

As for Jersey? I have no clue really what we would do. I know he wants to reconnect with friends so I'm excited about meeting them. The Mr. also talks about pizza places, his hangouts which were really random places, and his high school so I assume will we go to those- oh, and I want to see where he fell in a well at too.

Have you visited each others hometowns? What did you learn about each other?

Getting to Know You Honeymoon, Part 1

Me and the Mr. aren't the tropical kind of people. We live in Florida, but rather go canoeing in a river than playing in the beach.* Most people want to go some place exotic for their honeymoon- not us. We already live in paradise so going to the Carribean or Hawaii would be redunant. The only places I have ever really wanted to go are Cuba, Greece, and any place in Africa. Lately though I've added 3 other places to that list: France, London, and Germany. Cuba would be the easiest place to get to seeing as how I could practically swim to it, but I'm not Cuban and therefore the chances of me getting there without the laws changing are slim to none. I also try to stay as far away from swimming in the ocean as possible due to a near drowning experience as a child in the Pacific Ocean. The other places are off our list just because we don't have the money to go there.

Then we came up with another list: Camping, a dude ranch, rebuilding houses in New Orleans, or Disneyworld! Since Disneyworld is closest that will always remain a strong possibility plus I would love to stay in the hotel where giraffes walk right by your window. I'm too paranoid to go camping and would need 3 tazers and a gun just to get through the night. A dude ranch sounds nice but the packages I've seen have been too expensive. I love love love New Orleans. I could live there. There is something about the culture, the experience, the food, and the beignets! Sadly though, many of the parishes outside New Orleans have been neglected and a vast majority of it outside of the tourist regions have not been rebuilt. For my Spring Break 2 years ago I went to New Orleans with a group of 10 people from my school and we met up with a pretty huge group of kids from colleges across the country. We gutted houses and it was so worth it. I want to do it again and this time bring the Mr. I think it would be the perfect start to our lives together because I want to raise our children to think about others before themselves and I would like to volunteer religiously with my children as they grow and take these types of trips as a family more often.

What did we decide? See Part II.

*Note: Do not, under any circumstances, go in a river or lake in Florida- there are alligators and they will eat you.

Spring Break

Carmen SanDiego is back ladies and gentlemen. That's right, I'm going away for a while. I'm on Spring Break, have people to interview for a research project, am looking at wedding venues, and the FSIL is getting married Friday- so a busy busy week. Because of this, I am going to post this weeks post TODAY! I'll be back next week to fill you in and with pictures of venues.

Something Blue

I don't want a garter. Gasp! I know, I know, its a timeless tradition, blah blah blah. The idea of a garter and throwing it just seems dated to me. Although it used to be one of my favorite parts at weddings, I haven't seen anyone do it at the last couple of weddings I've been to and I didn't really miss it. To be honest, me and the Mr. just aren't garter throwing people. The problem I see in all of this is that I always figured my something blue would be on my garter, and now that I'm against all things garter (except the garter belt) I need to come up with something else that has my something blue.

I thought about maybe having my blue sewed into a part of my dress. The Mr. can sew so if I asked him to I'm sure he would do it and it would make my dress that much more special. I also thought about wearing these sapphire earrings I get compliments on everytime I wear them but quickly nixed that idea because I really want to wear my mothers diamond earrings as my something borrowed.

Then I made a polyvore board. Oh yes, I love playing around with it all. Did it give me any inspiration?- No, but again, it is pretty and that's all that matters. Actually, I really like the guys shoes pictured but I wont recommend them to the Mr. because they would clash with our colors. Something Blue
Something Blue - by jossyjos on

I am going today to drop off my 2nd engagement ring so a band can be made. It is going to be a black diamond eternity band, but maybe I'll add a sapphire or two in there to give it that something blue. If not this, then maybe the Mr.'s blue eyes will satisfy that requirement.

What is your something blue?

Sunday, March 15, 2009

The fairest of them all

I love love love Snow White. When I was younger my mom used to call me that because my lips were the color of a rose, skin the color of snow, and hair the color of ebony. Ever since then, I have considered Snow a style icon. I rock the red lips and red headband often. This morning, for whatever reason, I decided to dress up as her. I put on a yellow skirt, royal blue tank top, and put the red ribbon in my hair. Then this conversation happened:

The MR.: Hey Snow White. How's it going?
Me: Hey Charming, its going pretty well.
The MR: Good
Me: So, do you have a date to the dance?
The MR.: No
Me: Me neither and I really want to go. I think you should ask me
The MR.: Uh, I have other things to do that night

Suddenly I was offended that Charming messed up my story. For the next 20 minutes I tried to convince him to go to a dance with me- a dance that doesn't exist. He still wasn't having it. It wasn't until I told him that I was going to ask out Cinderella's Charming that he changed his tune. Don't worry, I'm not a boyfriend stealer- Cinderella transfered from Far Far Away High School to Ever After Prepatory.

Anywhoo, it got me thinking about having a Snow White themed wedding. I've mentioned it to the Mr. before but this time I was really considering it. I called my mom and she thought it was a great idea. I quickly got to thinking about all the stuff I could do to make a Snow White wedding. My dress could have a stand up collar, candy apples for everyone, and woodland creatures galore. The colors would be light yellow, red, and a royal blue. The problem is that this is all that I could think of. I watched Snow White on youtube for more inspiration but it left me with nothing. I didn't want to go to extreme because, well, I'm a grown up now, but if I kept it simple I doubt people would get it.

I then decided to make my very own polyvore board. It was my first one ever. It's not much but it's pretty.
The board though didn't make me want to commit to a Snow White theme, but that cute Snow Ice costume will be incorporated into a budoir shoot and I may just wear it to that dance Charming finally agreed to go to.

I like the idea of having an all out Disney wedding though, with my friends dressed as Cinderella, Aurora, and Jasmine too, and my little guy would be Pinnocchio since he's in that fibbing stage now.

Have you ever thought about incorporating your favorite storybook character into your wedding? If so, what details would you have to have?

Friday, March 13, 2009

Go ahead and let it all out.

I'm a supporter of venting- whether it's gushing it out in talk, yelling, screaming, painting, running...whatever. Even though my Spring Break officially starts today this past week has been pretty crappy and I just want to yell and my Song of the Week today reflects that.

"Caught out there" by Kelis has to be the best venting song ever. It's about a failed relationship but the hook makes it the perfect song to vent to- "I hate you so much right now, AAAAAAH." The video here is a funnier version, because who doesn't want to laugh and yell at the same time. Let it all out and Enjoy!

How do you deal with stress or having a bad day?

Oh I can't. I'm on a diet.

Oh I can't. I'm on a diet.

In high school I was 103 lbs. After I had my son I stayed at a good 115 lbs, but then I met the Mr. and went to law school. I gained 20 lbs my first year of law school. I don't know the reason. Maybe it was a delayed "freshman 15" since it was the first time I had left home, maybe I was nesting because I was just really really happy with the Mr., or maybe it was the fact that I was holed up reading casebooks and snacking all day with no exercise at all whatsoever. I think it was a mixture of all 3.

I've never been the workout type because I don't like to sweat. If I start to sweat, I stop doing whatever I was doing until the moment passes. The only exception to this was when I gutted houses in New Orleans after hurricane Katrina. My roommates last year dragged me to the gym and it was the first time I had ever worked out. Yes, I said ever. I did really well until I started to sweat and you guessed it, stopped. I did Bikrim Yoga for a while, and liked it. Even with all the heat I never sweated and found that I was pretty flexible. Unfortunately, Bikrim is only an occasional thing. Since I don’t workout, I decided that I needed to come up with a way to lose the extra weight before my wedding. Even though I'm 9 months away, I've already started.

Initially I decided that I could lose all my weight by getting rid of my coke habit. I drank about 6 cans of coke a day. Yes, I said 6 a day. I tried to go diet but yuck, I couldn't. In the end I went diet with other brands like Diet Dr. Pepper and diet Root Beer which has made all the difference. Diet Dr. Pepper and diet Root Beer are so good that they don’t taste like diet. I also started drinking more water, so now I drink maybe 2 cans of pop a day and the rest is water or hot tea, usually green, black, or constant comment. I didn't lose any weight though and knew more had to be done.

I am the first one to admit that I need to change my eating habits. I eat whatever I want, whenever I want. The problem is that now I gain weight when I do that. I wanted a program I could use that would be a) cheap, b) effective, and c) help me change my eating habits and I found one through Medifast.

Medifast is a series of shakes, oatmeals, soups, and bars that are low caloric and high in protein. In total you get around 800-950 calories a day. The catch is though, that you have to eat 6 meals a day: 5 medifast meals and 1 lean and green meal. The lean and green consists of something green like broccoli or a salad, and lean protein like select fish, chicken, or other meats. It is hard to eat 6 meals a day- like really hard, or at least for me it is. That means you have to eat every 2-3 hours. Medifast keeps me full so 2 or 3 hours comes and I'm not even hungry to eat anything yet.

The food isn't totally bad or good. The bars are good and so is the banana pudding. I'm a fan on the cappuccino and hot chocolate and the shakes aren't too bad either. Medifast guarantees a weight loss of 2-5 lbs per week. I lost 10 lbs during my first month.

After a month though, I went off of Medifast and resumed my bad eating habits even though I knew what I had to do- eat small healthy meals every 2-3 hours. Luckily, I haven't gained a pound of my weight back. Although the program is super easy to follow, I just couldn't limit myself to one normal meal a day especially because I'm encouraged to participate in networking opportunities where food is abundant and I swear, I have never been invited to as many lunches as I was while I was on my diet- my response: "Oh I can't. I'm on a diet". I want to get back to 115 lbs before my wedding day so I plan on going back onto Medifast until I lose another 10 to 15 pounds. I'll keep you posted on how well I do and if I decide to try anything else, like sweat.

What are you doing, if anything, to lose extra pounds?

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Product Review: Sally Hansen Airbrush Legs

I have great legs. I get compliments on them all the time. My legs are super hott- when I have tights or stockings on. My bare legs however are another story. I sleep itch, which turns into bleeding, which turns into scarring. Sorry for the yucky mental picture.
I chose a great dress from Macy's to wear during the first of my 2 engagement pictures. It stops about an 2 inches above my knees. Originally, I planned on wearing cowboy boots with it but that trend is sort of disappearing so I may just do simple heels and pearl, brass, and gold accessories. Regardless of the shoe or accessories I still have an ugly leg problem. This dress doesn't look good with tights so my old standby wont work.

I thought about maybe getting away with wearing nude pantyhose. This was, and still is, a strong possibility. As long as I choose a color that is close to my own skin tone and is sheer, no one but me, my love, and my photographer will know my secret. Before I resign myself to hose I decided to try leg make-up.

I looked at online reviews of Sally Hansen's Airbrush Legs before I made the purchase. I am such a cheapo that I require myself to do research before I buy something, even if it’s a $13 can of leg makeup. I found many opinions online. Most people liked it and others didn't but most of the people who didn't confused leg makeup with sunless tanner. I try to reserve judgment before calling people dense but I really don't understand how someone could confuse the two, especially considering that the product has no mention of sunless tanning. It does come in different colors- but doesn't all makeup?

Anywho, based on the reviews I decided to fork out $13 and bought a can from my local Walgreens. I decided to do both legs- 1 by spraying on my hands and then applying to my legs and the other by spraying directly on my legs and blending in like some opinionates suggested. I think I got a better application by spraying directly on my legs and blending but you have to be careful because it gets harder to blend correctly if you wait a while so I suggest spraying and blending small sections at a time.

The results turned out like what I would expect from leg makeup. It was very light to the touch though and it didn’t feel like I was wearing makeup but I think I may need more coverage to cover up my scars. I think this product would work well for women who have very minor problems. I tried to apply another coat, like I would do foundation to get more coverage, but at that point it started to look like I was wearing makeup and I didn't want that. After 10 minutes or so I took a white cloth and wiped it against one of my legs to see if the makeup would come off- it didn't! Getting it off in the shower though wasn't pretty- I had to scrub and you could see the makeup run down the drain which is expected I guess.

All in all I think Sally Hansen Airbrush Legs is great for people who have minor leg imperfections. Since I need a little more coverage that what Airbrush Legs can provide me I think I will go back to wearing sheer panty hose with my dress and may wear the leg makeup underneath just to make sure no imperfections show through the hose.

What beauty products have you experimented with? How did it turn out?

Monday, March 9, 2009

About me. About he. About we.

I'm Canadian ay? Not at all, ay. Then, What are you talking aboot? I'm taking about me, he, and we. At first I didn't really know you, and was a little shy, but I feel this crazy chemistry between us. I think after a month of blogging here, I'm ready for you to know more about me, he, and we. So here it goes….(deep breath).

Me. I'm always cold. I make myself laugh. I'm a great mommy.
He. He's always hot. He laughs at me. He's a wonderful daddy.
We. Together we are always the right temperature. We laugh at each other. We are super parents!

Was that enough? Didn't think so. Here we go again. Take 2.

I am a law student in my 2nd year. Originally from the Midwest, I consider myself a Midwestern girl even though I've lived in Florida for almost 10 years now. I'm an only child and I hear that I act like one. My face is the perfect merge between my mom and dad so I resemble them and don't resemble them at the same time. I'm a mommy first and foremost and nothing matters more to me than that little boy. I'm an advocate for equal and civil rights for all people of all nations regardless of their status, classification, religion,race, or sexual preference. I strive to read a newspaper everyday because I have a need to be informed and to know what is going on.I have really long fingers that look like skeletons and thin arms that resemble a praying mantis. I have so many insecurities but am happy with the person I am and ultimately happy with myself. I need to work on patience though.

He is a auto tech at a luxury dealership. He loves his work and he loves me. His mind is super simple and complicated at the same time. He understands things I can't even wrap my head around like physics, time, space, and all things scientific. He fell in a well when he was 2 and was featured on Rescue 911. He has full lips and bright blue eyes- he uses them to make cute faces I can't resist. He stays informed by watching the news daily and cooks every night since other people, ahem, don't know how. He is more efficient and hard working than most people I know. A true mans' man- he can fix and build anything you need which is just so sexy.

Together we click and it is super wonderful. We can't wait until we are super old so we can gross out the younger generation with our PDA!

What about you and your mate? How are you together and individually?

Friday, March 6, 2009

What's in a name? That's not my name!

I was never the girl who would write on her notebook Mrs. Pitt or Mrs. Depp, or even Mrs. Jonathan. Taylor Thomas, oh yeah, I took it there. Why? Because I like my last name. It's different, It's German, and I've never run into anyone with it. I've found some people on facebook with the same last name, but most of them are in Austria. The Mr.'s last name on the other hand is very common. Actually, everything about his name is common- first and last name. If you do a google search for me: you will definitely find me. Him however, no go. There are athletes, movie directors, criminal defendants, you name it!- that all have the same name as him. My last name is also the last in my family line. My father was adopted, never got remarried or had any other kids- so I am the only one. I like to think that this had something to do with the fact that I'm keeping my name, but in reality that had nothing to do with it.

I'm just selfish and I really like my name. Plus, my son has my last name and his full name makes it the preppiest name ever- I did this on purpose because whether you admit it or not, racism still exists in America, and I wanted to at least get his resume looked at. Everyone in my family has "safe" names so I refused to go "experimental" or ethnic for that reason. I tried to convince the Mr. that our future kids should have my last name as well but that discussion didn't go too well.

After we, one of us reluctantly, decided that our future kids could have his last name with no hyphenation of any sort I had to decide if I was going to take the plunge into new name-dom.
Before I made my decision, I considered all my options:
lets pretend my name is Agnes Rolder and his name is John Smith*

- Agnes Rolder-Smith. This was the best possibility I could think of, however that would be a long last name. I knew some kids in high school who had 2 last names. I thought of them and after a while I decided I couldn't go through with it. It would make my last name too long- 15 letters! Every time I would fill out a form half of my name would be cut off. I don't want to even think about how it would look on my drivers license with my 7 letter first name added to the bunch.

Both without the hyphenation- Agnes Rolder Smith. Just as good as the hyphenation, however it means that I would be referred to as Mrs. Smith instead of Rolder Smith and I just don't like his last name. If I was going to add it, I would need my name in there somewhere.

Making a new last name- Rolith. My example name comes out much better than my real name would. This was never really an option though because my hunny loves his name and doesn't want to change it. He actually worked with someone who did this and they both were happy with the new name.

Have him change his name- Mr. Rolder. As mentioned above, hunny loves his name and all the supposed family history that comes with it so that one is a no-go.

I then listed the pros and cons to changing my name:
Pros: New family, symbolism, blah blah blah, and its not like I'm established in my career or anything yet so it wouldn't cause confusion
Cons: I'm no one's property, going though the whole name change process, new name wouldn't sound right, there is always the possibility of divorce that no one wants to think about, I just don't like his name!

Surprisingly, the Mr. took this all very well. I think maybe it's because I've been preparing him since we met. And Mommy dearest is happy because she's been advocating for me to keep my name since we got engaged. I'm sure I'll hear something about it later from my old-school family members but I don't care, as long as there is an understanding between me and him then nothing else should matter, should it?

Real reason I wrote this post?- I wanted to get this song in your head. Today's song of the week is the infectious "That's not my name" by The Ting Tings. Who wouldn't want to dance to this at their wedding? It's just happy! Enjoy!

Are you keeping or changing your name? Was it an easy decision?

*Definitely not even close to our real names.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

You're the right one, baby!

I've already told you how the Mr. proposed but I have yet to tell you how we met, or anything about us for that matter. You'll have to wait to learn anything about us, because today's post is dedicated to how we met. *

I had a group of friends that I had distanced myself from. I started dating my best friend's brother and he didn't like my friends and my friends didn't like him. Between the 2 groups, I chose him mostly because my group of friends started hanging around shady individuals who I did not want to be associated with. Best friend's brother, lets call him Rocco**, was awesome. We got along great- until we started going out. He became verbally abusive and after months of break-up and make-up's I finally called it quits in late May 2004. The day we broke up turned out to be the start of something so much better.

My friend Margarita** invited me to her birthday party. She was not part of the shady group of friends I was trying to get away from, in fact, she was the opposite-- the first one in her family to graduate from college and now she is an RN. (SO PROUD OF YOU!). I decided to go since it had been forever since I had seen her and invited Rocco along. Surprisingly, Rocco agreed to come. I say surprisingly because he had never wanted to be with or around my friends before. We both drove separate cars because he didn't want to stay very long and I felt I owed it to Margarita to stay longer. When we got there though Rocco totally flaked. He didn't want to go and didn't want me to go either. Needless to say, I was peeved. We got into an argument and I just brushed him off and went into the party. By this time though I was in a bad mood because of his behavior but I put a smile on my face for the birthday girl. A few minutes later though Rocco calls my phone and starts calling me names equivalent to a promiscuous woman and female dog*. At that point I just got so mad that I gave Margarita her gift and left the party- I had only been there for probably 15 minutes.

My parents had 2 houses in the same city at the time because they were in the process of selling one . One was way east and the other was way west. Because I didn't feel like going home yet I headed for the West home that no one lived in. I really just wanted to be by myself. Rocco calls to call me more names and I told him I was leaving and going to my West home and I broke up with him for like the 20th time. On my way west I got a phone call from my old group of friends asking me to come by Kelly's** house because she had some friends in town. At this exact point I was right by Kelly's house and agreed to come by. I got there and reunited with everyone since I hadn't seen any of them in months and met Kelly's friends from NJ. There were 3 of them and one caught my eye because he was different. He looked preppy, clean cut, and put together-so he definitely stood out compared to everyone else there. I was definitely attracted to him and after talking to him the attraction just grew stronger.

Then I got a phone call from Rocco. I ignored it. He called a few more times and I ignored each one. I didn't want to talk to him. My phone went dead so I used Kelly's phone to check my messages. No surprise there- it was Rocco calling me more names. He was at my West house waiting for me because I he wanted to talk and I was a ___, a ________, and a _____ for not being there. I was upset but the future Mr. calmed me down and said that no one should ever call me those names, nor make me feel that way, and that I was better without him.

I went home that night and instead of being heartbroken about my 20th breakup with Rocco, I was happy about meeting this wonderful guy. He was awesome. I thought about him all the time. Just thinking about him made me happy. I didn't consider pursuing him any further though because I thought he was going back to NJ. Little did I know, his family had recently moved down here- Is that fate or what? Even though I had just broke up with Rocco, I was ready for a relationship with the Mr. because I had been emotionally single for many many months. Our friends encouraged us to get together so we continued talking, he asked me out a month later, and we've never looked back. As another blogger says, he makes my world glitter.

So many things about this story make me believe that we were meant to be together. 1) The Mr. didn't want to come down to my city that night. He was tired and wanted to stay home but his friends persuaded him. 2)And after not hanging, or wanting to hang out with t his certain group of friends, I finally went over there. 3) I wouldn't have even went over there if it hadn't of been for the fight, the sudden break up, and me already heading in that direction. Perfect phone call at the perfect time. The sad part about this is that I don't even know the date all this happened, I just know it was mid to late May 2004.

As for me and Rocco- we are friends. We were great friends before we started dating and there was no reason that we couldn't be friends after it ended. Relationships are learning experiences and I learned what I needed to in that one. I don't have any ill feelings towards him because he is a great guy, he just wasn't a great guy with me. The Rocco that existed when we were together was not the real Rocco. He even admits that during our relationship he just turned into someone he wasn't and because of it he went and took Anger Management classes. Something about us being together was just toxic. If that isn't proof that 2 people just shouldn't be together I don't know what is. We have gone out to lunch, talked on the phone, and are Facebook friends. And every chance I get I thank him for being such a jerk to me that night, because if it wasn't for that I never would have met the Mr., and if it wasn't for the Mr. I would have probably went back to Rocco. ***

How did you meet your Mr.? How did you know he was the right one?

PG-13 rated version*
Definitely not real names**
*** Verbal abuse is just as damaging as physical abuse. It took me a very long to realize that my relationship with Rocco was hurting me, even though there were no physical signs. No one should make you feel less than what you are. Please seek help and get out of the relationship, if not for you then for the people around you. You are more important that you will ever know. Sites like can help you realize the warning signs and get you on the road to help.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

All of the Beautiful Colors

Thank goodness for Snippet & Ink. I had a lukewarm love for grey and pale pink. I was going to add hot pink in there and make it my own but I couldn't get past the image of those colors at the beach. They just didn't scream beach to me. If I was going to be anywhere else then those colors would be love, but I wasn't going to change my location just because of a color scheme.

Then Urban Lavender came along and I started to think purples and grey. I had never ever ever ever been a purple fan. I think every color has been my favorite at one point in time but never purple. Purple has been lucky to be in my closet though, because, well, I look good in purple but I'm not a fan.

I could see lavender and grey at the beach. I could see my hunny in a grey suit, vest, and deep purple tie. I could see my bridesmaids in different colored purple dresses. I could see my bouquet as a bunch of lavender stalks. I could see my son with grey pants and a lavender vineyard vines cummerbund and bow tie. All on the beach.

I found my wedding colors! How did you find yours? How many times did you change it before your big day?

Inspiraton Boards via Snippet & Ink

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Anna Maria Island

I'm getting married on Anna Maria Island in sunny ol' Florida. My parents have 6 boutiques: 2 on Anna Maria, 2 on local Bradenton Beach, and another on Longboat Key. Everything about the 7 mile Island is beautiful and laid back so it was an easy choice, plus unlike most islands, this one is unspoiled- meaning there are no high rises, panhandlers, or fast food chains-it's just pure unadulterated Island. Best known for its white sand and beautiful clear blue beaches, it has been the best kept secret of tourists for years but recently the secret has gotten out and more and more people are discovering the Island. It has been featured in magazines like Parade, USA Today, Southern Living, and almost every American vacation magazine.
Movies like the Perfect Storm with George Clooney, Palmetto with Woody Harrelson, and Out of Time with Denzel Washington have been filmed there, and it is known as the "wedding capital" of Florida even though I have never seen an Anna Maria Island wedding featured in a wedding magazine or website. This is partly because Anna Maria is naming itself that. An exact number of weddings per year will never be know though- since Anna Maria is just a municipality and vendors wont divulge any official information.

Because my parents do business on the Island and yes, I used to slave away there, we are trying to keep our vendors as incestuous as possible. I am trying my hardest not to have to go out to mainland for anything except my dress and his suit.
Of course, living 4 hours away in Miami gets in the way when I am trying to pick out venues. I'm going up at the end of March to handle my business so I'll be back with plenty of pictures to share.

One of the best things about the Island- There is a free trolley on the Island so my guests will be set in getting to and from the reception, everything is within walking or bike riding distance, and I'm sure everyone will be excited to spot a Manatee nearby! They are too cute!

For the recent USA Today article on Anna Maria: You can tell how much people love it from the comments, like "Keep AMI our little secret" and "I've traveled quite a lot, but this gem in Fla. Is truly a piece of paradise!"

What is special about the place you are getting married?

Monday, March 2, 2009

Where do I sign?

So I know black people, Jews, immigrants, or any other minority didn't exist back in the late 1800's (If you've read the book Ragtime you know what I mean), but as I've been looking at Victorian marriage certificates I have gotten discouraged with all the white faces and blonde hair I see on the certificates. It's a little disheartening because I love the look of these certificates but even though the men look like the Mr., they don't look like me. And for some reason I have only fallen in love with the certificates that have people on them- I don't know how that happened. If I do decide to go this route, I may have to whip out the black marker and tan colored pencil and color the women in like I used to do with cartoons as a kid.

I've looked into other certificates too. Like Quaker certificates. These are the kind that all of your wedding guests sign. I love that idea because it just adds more significance to that special day, and who knows, one of your guests may turn out to be the next Barack Obama and then you can show people your certificate and say "See, Barack really is my homeboy."

Another type of certificate is a Ketubah. This is the Jewish prenuptial agreement or wedding contract. Although neither of us are Jewish or religious at all, I like this type document, and they happen to be some of the prettiest documents I have ever seen. A Ketubah acts as a blueprint of the marriage and lays out everything, and when I say everything I mean everything. It says how much the husband gives the wife in the event of his death, who is responsible for what duties in the household, and even, ahem, "relations". The Ketubah is signed by the bride, groom, and 2 witnesses. I've been told that it is the most important part of a Jewish wedding ceremony.

I still have yet to decide, and I have quite a while to ponder, but some of the best I've seen are from a site called and some of their designs have interracial couples- yay me! They even have certificates featuring Asians, Hispanics, and ones for the LGBT community which are my favorite. My only hope is that one day soon "commitment certificate" while be changed to "marriage certificate".

Are you thinking about getting a wedding certificate? How did you choose?

papercut Ketubah from

Sunday, March 1, 2009

If they lived to be 100, it still wouldn't be enough

The title of my post is a paraphrase of a comment I saw on a news story about Michelle and Barack Obama's affection for each other. I tried to find the comment but couldn't- it was posted at least 4 months ago, but the commenter basically said that the way they look at each other makes you think that even if they lived to 100, it still wouldn't be enough time. I love that. It makes me think of me and the Mr.

I can't help but be inspired by Michelle and Barack and their family dynamic. Even with all the hoopla they seem incredibly grounded. And don't even get me started on those beautiful girls! I'm like mama bear when it comes to those girls and I don't even know them. "Don't nobody talk bad about them Obama girls. Nobody"

I love the way they treat each other. Unlike other politicans, Barack looks at his wife when she speaks and she him. They treat each other as equals. Regardless of which end of the spectrum you are on, you have to take notice of the fact that this is what true real love looks like. I hope someone sees that in us one day.

What famous relationships inspire you?