Did we find our dream house yet? Nope. At first I was just looking because I had a down payment and a dream- for a while I thought that was all that mattered but I was wrong, and really stupid. Like really, money and a dream? Anywhoo, looking back I'm actually happy that we didn't settle on anything just yet. To be honest, in the time that we have had to think about what we want in a house, our wants and needs have gotten a whole lot clearer. I guess that's what they mean by impulse control. Look ma, I'm learnin! So we are just going to wait, even if that means the tax credit passes us by and we stay homeownerless for years. Finding a house is like finding a mate-I want it to be in my life forever and invest in it so it's worth taking the time to find the right one.
So why am I back then? Well my tag line still applies. I'm still a crazy law student, although that journey is almost over, and I am still on a quest for the perfect low- key laid back awesomely awesome wedding. And I have re-started this quest: to elope to San Francisco City Hall. So come with me and you'll be in a world of pure imagination, because I really want to name my daughter Violet and have a chocolate river.
I'm finally done with finals which means that I am officially a 3L. Whoop Whoop! 1 more year to go and I am officially out of this beast.
But.....I have exciting news. We are "eloping" and buying a house instead of having a wedding. My mom suggested we just take the money instead, couple that with the 8K tax credit for first time buyers and ta da!- buy a house. And just like that we rolled with it. HGTV has become my new favorite channel- I get why my mom watches it all the time. We've been looking at houses so far I have only found "lukewarm" like. I wont settle, and if we don't find the house we want this year then we just keep looking until we do. The good thing though is that wedding planning didn't take away all my creativity. I have came up with a million things I want to do to my house. Install hardwood floors, paint a faux-wood garage door, have a reddish brown front door, make slip covers for my huge couch, make mirrored art deco style dressers...It seems like a lot but luckily I am marrying a man who actually knows how to do stuff, and sew. Amazing! Him and his dad re-did their kitchen themselves and re-tiled the entire pool area- not just the pool. This blog may turn into that adventure.
I found a place that I want to get married at and the MR. has agreed that it would be perfect. Even my mom agrees. So where? San Fransisco City Hall! It is absolutely gorgeous and I already bought a dress- the "Julianne" from J.Crew. Plus, California allows you to get a confidential wedding license which means no one can look at it unless they have a court order. In this day of identity theft something like that is worth getting. We still plan on taking engagement pictures though so I will upload them in Novemeber or so, because that is when we are doing them. Our wedding will turn into a wedding + mini honeymoon. And then we will have a reception/graduation party/ housewarming party when my family is in town for my law school graduation--- the one that is only a year away! Whoo hooo!
As for the date, we aren't sure. There are really only 2 times of the year where it can be done- Winter or Spring Break. I'm leaning more towards Spring though just because of how pretty it is in the San Fran area.
The song "Here it Goes Again" by OK go has been a favorite of mine for a while but what really made me think of it today was because I was thinking of "first dance" songs for me and the Mr. I can dance because luckily the black side of me contributed enough to give me rhythm. The Mr. on the other hand is stereotypically white- he even claps off beat, and I really just hate dancing with him. Yes, I said hate. I love love to dance, but it becomes a chore to do it with him. I've tried working with him before but nothing ever improves so I have come to the conclusion that for our first dance we either: a) don't do a dance which is a high high probability; b) use someone else to dance with which is a not going to happen even though I've gotten offers because the first dance is supposed to be with me and the Mr. I may not agree with half of the wedding hoopla in the industry but that is one I subscribe to. Other dances, yes or maybe, but not the first dance; or c) pick a song and dance that has a non-traditional way of dancing. And with that choice comes this song, this video, and this dance. I would jump at doing it in a heartbeat and I already know at least 6 people I could count on to do it with me even though all I need are 2. Plus, the Mr. agrees that it would be pretty awesome. Too bad Rock the Reception isn't on anymore because that would have been awesome to do. I wonder how I would get 8 treadmills on my own anyway, and what reception site would actually let me do it? Hmmmmm......
What type of dancing are you doing for your first?
Long Distance relationships are hard, or so I hear. For the first 4 1/2 years of our relationship, me and the Mr. were long distance lovers. When we met he lived an hour away and we would sometimes meet in the middle and spend the day together or take turns spending the week or weekend with each other. After a year, he moved another hour further away for school and we saw each other maybe once a month. The next year, he moved back but I moved 5 hours away from him for law school and during that first year we saw each other only 3 or 4 times.
So how did we make it work? Compromise, communication and understanding.
Compromise- Everything we did during our long distance relationship was a compromise, because it needed to be. We took turns traveling to see the other, splitting up the holidays we spent with which family, and compromised on anything else that either of us felt was important.
Communication- Communication is key to any healthy and successful relationship and we always made sure that we took time out to have enough of it. We got on the same family plan for our phone (the ultimate commitment) so that we could call each other at any time and we took full advantage of it, or at least I did. I knew I could call him at any time, day or night, and just talk so it was like he was there even though we were physically apart. We talked to each other every night for maybe 3-4 hours. There was always something to talk about- news, politics, tourists, scientific theories,us,our favorite show Heroes- and it helped me get to know more about him as a person and his views on the world.
I also took to writing him letters while he was in school. Everyday I would take time out to write a letter at at the end of the week. I would decorate an envelope and mail it out. He still has all those letters and refuses to throw them out. As I read over them I realize how diverse the topics of those letters were- ranging from the ridiculous to the profound.
Understanding- We both understood that there was nothing at the time that we could do to be physically closer to one another and we also understood that we were willing to work to make this relationship succeed. Once we understood that it seems like everything else followed perfectly from that. To be honest, this relationship hasn't been real "work" because I love him so much and there is nothing hard about that.
Long distance is normal for us so when it came time for us to move in together last year I wasn't sure it would work. I've seen relationships take a turn for the worse when a couple moves in together mainly because they just don't work as roommates. Surprisingly, we are great roommates, bunk buddies, whatever you want to call it. We mesh well. He does all the cooking, I do....um, laundry? Plus, we are great parents and realize that that little boy is the most imporant person in the house.
As I get ready to graduate I'm forced with the realization that I may end up moving away from him if I get a job elsewhere. Of course, I don't want that but with the economy the way that it is and the area of law I want to practice it is a very real and plausible possibility. We have talked it over and if need be we are willing to be a long-distance married couple until the time comes for one of us to move to the other. It isn't ideal of course but in the words of Tim Gunn, we will "make it work".
To go along with my long-distance post, I thought "Hey There Delilah" by the Plain White T's would fit as my Song of the Week.
Have you ever been at a distance from your love? How did you make it work?
As I write this my lips are tingling. Do you want to know why? Of course you do. I have been on a quest for thicker, fuller, zexy lips ever since I've realized how inadequate mine are. Thankfully, I don't have super thin lips so I have something to build on but they aren't anything special.
I've learned how to put on liner and gloss in such a way to make your pout appear fuller but I want them to be bigger without needles or surgery. I decided to try DuWop's lip venom to see if maybe, just maybe, there was something behind all the hype. I found that there wasn't much there.
Here is what DuWop says about their product: "Lip Venom is formulated with a blend of essential oils, including cinnamon, wintergreen and ginger which cause the blood to rush to the surface of the lips, flushing and swelling them slightly. It also contains jojoba and avocado oil to hydrate and leave an intense shine".
I put it on and well, nothing happened. It's supposed to give you a bee-sting look and maybe it did, I dunno. It made my lips appear bigger but it had no actual plumping effect. To be honest, I could have stuck with my lip liner and gloss combo and gotten the same effect, especially considering the $15 price tag.
Will I keep it? Yes because I like the stinging sensation and also because the Mr. likes it. He doesn't know why but I think it makes him think of sex. I say that because almost anything can make a man think of sex.
I took an absolutely horrendous final yesterday and still have another one and a paper to go, but I missed you and what better way to show you my love than to talk about myself some more?
I know we've all heard of the destination wedding and the destination honeymoon but how about the destination bachelorette party? My MOH came up with the idea and suggested it to me and I was surprised and excited all at the same time. I never really considered having a bachelorette party. I just figured I would put on a veil, sash, and go out to a club on South Beach with a group of friends and we would just call it a bachelorette party. My MOH also lives in DC so I didn't actually expect her to plan anything but I was so happy that she thought about it, especially considering the fact that I didn't ask her to be by MOH- I more or less told her that she was going to be my MOH and let her figure out the acronym on her own.
We passed ideas back and forth. She thought New Orleans would be a great place and I agreed considering we had gone 2 years before and loved it so much, but thinking of my friends in law school, the ones who were the most current friends in my life, I realized that it wouldn't be such a great idea. It could work- but its our last year and I doubt any of them would want to travel to New Orleans to party especially when we live in Miami and everyday is an excuse to party around here.
Next idea was a three day cruise. I thought of this for simplicity reasons only- we could leave out of Miami and I would miss at the most 2 days of school. We would go in September or October when missing a day of school isn't that big of a deal and I can work on getting my pale white white legs tan before the wedding. This would be easier for all my law school chicas as well. Only problem, September and October are both during Hurricane Season and all I can think about is Murphy's Law. We haven't figured out yet where this three-day cruise will go to though. I'm just excited that I finally have a reason to get a passport- I'm going to start practicing for my picture right away!
Are there any destinations in your wedding planning future?
